


Rumple and Robin’s Big City Adventure

by prissygirl



Series: 100 Follower Promptathon [5]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, total crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-26
Updated: 2015-04-26
Packaged: 2018-03-25 22:20:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3827071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prissygirl/pseuds/prissygirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: while in NYC, Rumple runs into Robbin Hood and they send Regina selfies in front of various tourist spots. Regina is not too thrilled about this new friendship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rumple and Robin’s Big City Adventure

It was the busy time of day at Granny’s as the residents of Storybrooke came and went for the noon lunch rush. Regina didn’t see or hear any of it as she frowned down at her phone. No matter how hard she wished, the image on her screen didn’t go away.

The Author must really hate me, Regina thought.

When her phone had lit up, Regina had been shocked to see Rumpelstiltskin’s name. Receiving a text from him after his banishment was the last thing she ever expected.

At least, it had been until she opened the message and stared down in horror at the image on the screen.

Rumpelstiltskin and Robin were posing in front of Radio City, their arms slung around each other’s shoulders like old friends, grinning from ear to ear.

The caption accompanying it merely read _#BestRoomieEver_.

Regina let out a cry of frustration and hurled a fireball across the diner. The coat rack caught on fire and Sneezy barely escaped with his life as he quickly dodged out of the way.

Granny’s closed early for lunch that day.

\------------------------------------

It was later that afternoon when Regina’s phone lit up again, showing that she had a new message. She ignored it, shuffling through some papers on her desk, trying to pretend her work as mayor was important and couldn’t be put off.

After the phone went off for the fifth time in an hour, Regina lunged for it with a growl.

She opened the messages and found selfie after selfie of the two of them posing all along Broadway. The most recent showed them in front of a display for Wicked. Robin was pointing towards the figure of the witch and laughing at Rumpelstiltskin who was flicking off the poster. In the very background of the photo, she thought she could see Marian standing off to the side, looking positively murderous.

That makes two of us, Regina thought.

The texts continued far into the night, as the now proclaimed _#DynamicDuo_ made their way through as many New York tourist spots as they could. The two even took photos on the subway. Regina almost spit out her mouthful of merlot when she read the caption beneath.

_Robin says it’s #TheBestRideOfHisLife_

As she had all day, Regina continued to ignore the imp’s messages, but it was becoming harder and harder to do so. The only thing that kept her resolve strong was that she knew he was trying to get a reaction out of her. Eventually he would get tired of his little game and Regina could happily return to her sad and lonely life.

Unfortunately for her, Rumpelstiltskin didn’t tire easily – something she unfortunately already knew from eavesdropping on a conversation with Belle and Ruby once. The messages kept coming, even as the night began to grow late.

 _#R &R_ had decided to ditch Marian and have a boys’ night out on the town. Rumple seemed to be teaching Robin about the finer points of expensive scotch. By the time they had taken their most recent photo, it was clear they had both drunk their fair share.  

Three-fourths of a bottle of merlot later, Regina was ready to set something on fire again. Gold’s pawnshop seemed appropriate, but she knew the magical items within were too valuable to destroy. His horrible pink house seemed appropriate, but she wasn’t sure if Belle was still living there. Kidnapping Belle was always fun, of course, but she didn’t think Emma would approve of that.

Heroes were so boring sometimes, Regina grumped as she poured herself another glass.

She must have fallen asleep at her desk, because the next thing she knew, she awoke to the sound of her phone beeping and the late morning sun peeking through her window.

Regina groaned, cradling her pounding head in her arms. She had finished off one bottle and started a second at some point, though she didn’t remember doing it.

A piece of paper lay in her printer. Regina reached for it and was rather unsurprised to see that she had booked a plane ticket to New York City. She glanced at the clock and realized she had less than three hours to pack and drive to the airport located in the next town over.

She stood quickly, her vision swimming for a moment before clearing. She’d make a quick stop to see Emma and Henry, and perhaps Belle too. In the time that it took her to get to New York and straighten those boys out, the residents of Storybrooke had better fix the issue of the town line.

As she scrambled to get a bag together for her trip, she briefly wondered at the frequency of Rumpelstiltskin’s texting. She knew he had only meant to annoy her, but his behavior still seemed rather out of character. If she didn’t know any better, she would think he was purposely provoking her into coming to New York.  

Remembering that she had awoken to a noise from her phone, Regina opened the message, frowning when she saw what it said.

It was from Rumpelstiltskin. “Bring a bucket of water. Or better yet, a house.”


End file.
